Released: March 9, 2019
Songwriter: Alexi von Guggenberg Kyle Evans Maggie Eckford Josh Bruce Williams Dave
Producer: Kyle Evans
[Intro]
Tuesday, 23rd of January, 2018
I'm here with David
This is our first session
We're just gonna talk about your background
Where you're from, any issues you've been dealing with
So, where should we start?
[Verse]
Look
Stop all the pain
How do you stop all the pain, huh?
I used to hear a voice when I was praying
But nowadays, I don't even wanna be saved
Nah, fuck that, I don't wanna be saved
I was born to be wild, I don't wanna be tamed
Talent's in my blood and I don't wanna be vain
But if I'm a psycho, then I don't wanna be sane
I used to dream of this shit when I was hopping on train
So, so bad, I used to want all the fame
My ex-girl want to shoot a cover for Vogue
Which is pretty ironic 'cause she's top of the range
If any one of you take a shot on a track
My niggas come back and put a shot in your frame
Easy as the alphabet
Three G's in the ring, call me Alvarez
My teacher used to say I need counseling
Couldn't stop asking me, "What do you feel?"
There's so many old scars that they wanna reveal
We got off on the wrong foot 'cause I don't want him to heal, nah
But if you're looking for a psycho, you got one
I thought I had a screw loose but I lost one
Ninety-nine problems, money, it is not one
My currency's Kenyan, that's in it for the long run, huh
Tears on a pillow
Bro, I shed so many tears on a pillow
I used to tell my teachers that nobody gets it
I don't know Clarke but I know that I'm a Kidult
'Cause my mummy ain't been home, miss thinks I'm involved
Blame my environment, it made me a sicko
Furthermore, I should bring that bitch down to Streatham
And then make her spend a day in a veil like a widow
Kiddo, we seen swords longer than a limo
My bros are blacksmiths like Jaden and Willow
Man, there's weapons over here, we're reppin' over here
We're from the Southside but it's Streatham over here
No telling if you're selling, hold the wettin' over here
Get him over here, who the fuck is checkin' over here?
Most my niggas are the ones applying pressure over here
Fuck assault, I can get a nigga peppered over here, whoa
We wanted more, then some food on the strip or moving a brick
My niggas went to school with the rich and we were broke
Hiding crow in a Rubicon drink
Which is funny 'cause that's how we put food in the fridge
So, who am I?
Someone tryna live his best life
I just wanna take a pretty woman for a test drive
If I bring her to my room and I press, I
Guarantee she gonna see the force like an ex-wife
People tell me I'm a little bit barmy
For my army, I need a bottle of Bacardi
If it's me and a pouch with my dargy
Shawty, you're seeing two stars in the party
Fuck what you heard
I'm a top boy and I ain't giving man a turn
I don't wanna know a pretty woman wanna flirt
Learned you can judge a nigga by the women that he curves
I love this game, I ain't lost focus
I'm a hitmaker, if you haven't noticed
I could be the rapper with the message like you're hoping
But what's the point in me being the best if no one knows it?
Brother I'm a careful, humble, reckless, arrogant, extravagant
Nigga probably battlin' with manic depression
Man, I think I'm going mad again
It's like I'm happy for a second then I'm sad again
And to my fans, the reason I could get to this
You're my drug, the instrumental my therapist
Man, I need some therapy
My girl saying that she'll never leave
I'm scared she gonna find a better me
Deeper insecurities, like
What if I don't leave a legacy?
Money, why they check for me?
Mummy lost respect for me
I wish we could be together but that ain't how life works
I used to cry about my dad until my fucking eyes burnt
Nose running, you don't know nothing
Before I put a penny on the table, I provided for my family
Held my mother's hand through the agony, hey
You ever fall 'sleep 'cause you don't wanna be awake?
In a way, you're tired of the reality you face?
If you're thinking 'bout doing it
Suicide doesn't stop the pain, you're only moving it
Lives that you're ruining
Thoughts of a world without you in it, hiding
I ain't psycho but my life is
Tuesday, 23rd of January, 2018
I'm here with David
This is our first session
We're just gonna talk about your background
Where you're from, any issues you've been dealing with
So, where should we start?
[Verse]
Look
Stop all the pain
How do you stop all the pain, huh?
I used to hear a voice when I was praying
But nowadays, I don't even wanna be saved
Nah, fuck that, I don't wanna be saved
I was born to be wild, I don't wanna be tamed
Talent's in my blood and I don't wanna be vain
But if I'm a psycho, then I don't wanna be sane
I used to dream of this shit when I was hopping on train
So, so bad, I used to want all the fame
My ex-girl want to shoot a cover for Vogue
Which is pretty ironic 'cause she's top of the range
If any one of you take a shot on a track
My niggas come back and put a shot in your frame
Easy as the alphabet
Three G's in the ring, call me Alvarez
My teacher used to say I need counseling
Couldn't stop asking me, "What do you feel?"
There's so many old scars that they wanna reveal
We got off on the wrong foot 'cause I don't want him to heal, nah
But if you're looking for a psycho, you got one
I thought I had a screw loose but I lost one
Ninety-nine problems, money, it is not one
My currency's Kenyan, that's in it for the long run, huh
Tears on a pillow
Bro, I shed so many tears on a pillow
I used to tell my teachers that nobody gets it
I don't know Clarke but I know that I'm a Kidult
'Cause my mummy ain't been home, miss thinks I'm involved
Blame my environment, it made me a sicko
Furthermore, I should bring that bitch down to Streatham
And then make her spend a day in a veil like a widow
Kiddo, we seen swords longer than a limo
My bros are blacksmiths like Jaden and Willow
Man, there's weapons over here, we're reppin' over here
We're from the Southside but it's Streatham over here
No telling if you're selling, hold the wettin' over here
Get him over here, who the fuck is checkin' over here?
Most my niggas are the ones applying pressure over here
Fuck assault, I can get a nigga peppered over here, whoa
We wanted more, then some food on the strip or moving a brick
My niggas went to school with the rich and we were broke
Hiding crow in a Rubicon drink
Which is funny 'cause that's how we put food in the fridge
So, who am I?
Someone tryna live his best life
I just wanna take a pretty woman for a test drive
If I bring her to my room and I press, I
Guarantee she gonna see the force like an ex-wife
People tell me I'm a little bit barmy
For my army, I need a bottle of Bacardi
If it's me and a pouch with my dargy
Shawty, you're seeing two stars in the party
Fuck what you heard
I'm a top boy and I ain't giving man a turn
I don't wanna know a pretty woman wanna flirt
Learned you can judge a nigga by the women that he curves
I love this game, I ain't lost focus
I'm a hitmaker, if you haven't noticed
I could be the rapper with the message like you're hoping
But what's the point in me being the best if no one knows it?
Brother I'm a careful, humble, reckless, arrogant, extravagant
Nigga probably battlin' with manic depression
Man, I think I'm going mad again
It's like I'm happy for a second then I'm sad again
And to my fans, the reason I could get to this
You're my drug, the instrumental my therapist
Man, I need some therapy
My girl saying that she'll never leave
I'm scared she gonna find a better me
Deeper insecurities, like
What if I don't leave a legacy?
Money, why they check for me?
Mummy lost respect for me
I wish we could be together but that ain't how life works
I used to cry about my dad until my fucking eyes burnt
Nose running, you don't know nothing
Before I put a penny on the table, I provided for my family
Held my mother's hand through the agony, hey
You ever fall 'sleep 'cause you don't wanna be awake?
In a way, you're tired of the reality you face?
If you're thinking 'bout doing it
Suicide doesn't stop the pain, you're only moving it
Lives that you're ruining
Thoughts of a world without you in it, hiding
I ain't psycho but my life is