What If I Was Gay? (Alternate Version)Joyner Lucas

[Verse 1: Joyner Lucas]
Uh
What if I told you that I was different?
What if I told you that something's missin'?
And what if I told you we're not alike
And the way that I feel inside is different than what you picture
What if I told you I feel divided?
Keep to myself and I'm awfully quiet
And what if I told you I been conflicted by my own thoughts
Trapped in the dark, and I tried to hide it
No, I'm not a slave to no fuckin' fairy tale
I bet you think that you know me very well
Make no mistake, this is not a cry for help
'Cause I don't owe no one no explanation on how I feel

[Pre-Chorus: Joyner Lucas]
But on the real, what if I told you that I was brave?
I grew up different than I was raised
But still, what if I told you I'm out of place? Wait
What if I told you that I was gay?

[Chorus: Joyner Lucas]
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh

[Verse 2: Joyner Lucas]
Yeah
What if I told you I'm not alright?
I mean, I don't feel dеad, but I'm not alive
And what if I told you, "I'm not like you"
And the shit I'vе been goin' through, it'll prolly make you cry
And what if I told you, "I'm not this"
And the person you think you know don't exist
Look, I'm not who you know, I'm not who you wish
I'm not who you want me to be, what you want from me isn't this
I grew up in church where I couldn't be myself
I felt like a prisoner, couldn't leave my cell
They told me, "God don't like ugly," and this an ugly world
And if I ever seen things different, then I would burn in hell

[Pre-Chorus: Joyner Lucas]
And on the real, this is not new, this is not a phase
I grew up different than I was raised
But still, what if I told you I'm out of place? Wait
What if I told you that I was gay?

[Chorus: Joyner Lucas]
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh

[Verse 3: Eminem]
What if I told you I'm homophobic?
And you have zero control over your impulses
And the genetic flaw in your chromosomes is the culprit
It's somethin' I can't sugarcoat, it's repulsive
We were homies, since children, I thought it
But thought I was buggin', though
'Cause we'd sit, chill and just talk chicks
Now how can we be friends still on the block
When skin pigment is not our biggest difference, it's awkward
Don't think it's somethin' I can't deal with
Think I'm 'onna vomit, I'm gettin' this sick feelin', I'm nauseous
Part of me wishes you'd kept this shit, still in the closet
I'm white, but this is givin' me mixed feelings, like Logic
I remember kids stealin' your big wheel and callin' you sissy
'Cause you wouldn't do shit really to stop it
And now it all makes sense
Is this the end of our friendship?
It's startin' to send chills through my body
Yeah, I'm pissed off a little, this is a choice
We were s'posed to be boys
You're actin' like this ain't optional
What if I said you was weak?
'Cause you don't got the strength to conquer some biological monster that's part of you
That's responsible for them homosexual thoughts
If you don't want a lecture, part
Like a sofa section or long as you
Make your decision and stand by it, but I can't be beside it
'Cause for me, that'd be next to impossible
Or you learn to control your urges
You say, "It's like pullin' teeth and morals are oral surgeons"
But how would you even know anyways if you're a virgin
Why can't you be a normal person?
What if I tried steerin' you towards a girlfriend?
Wouldn't work, would it? You seem pretty surefooted
I'm sure good at judgin', but I have no right
I know goodbye seems cold, right?
Not even a flicker of hope like a strobe light
As I leave and I swear I stayed up that whole night
And no, I didn't know you would go right home and go take your own life
I ain't mean for that shit to happen, I said I won't cry (shit)
Fast-forward, some years go by
My girl's pregnant with twins, boy and girl
Fast-forward again, they just turned seven
I wish I had a crystal ball 'cause now I sit in awe
Just caught my son in a bra playin' with his sister's dolls with lipstick on

[Chorus: Joyner Lucas & Eminem]
Duh nuh, (fuck) duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, (I thought it was a choice) duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh, duh nuh nuh duh
Duh nuh