The Ballad of John and YokoTeenage Fanclub

(Lennon/McCartney)

Standing in the dock at Southampton, trying to get to Holland Or France
The man in the mac said, "you've got to go back,"
You know they didn't even give us a chance

Christ!
You know it ain't easy, you know how hard it can be
The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me

Finally made the plane into Paris, honeymooning down by the Seine
Peter Brown called to say, "you can make it O.K.,
You can get married in Gibraltar near Spain."

Christ!
You know it ain't easy, you know how hard it can be
The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me

Drove from Paris to the Amsterdam Hilton, talking in our beds for a week
The newspeople said, "say what you doing in bed?"
I said "we're only trying to get us some peace."

Christ!
You know it ain't easy, you know how hard it can be
The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me

Saving up your money for a rainy day
Giving all your clothes to charity
Last night the wife said
"Oh boy, when you're dead you don't take nothing with your soul"
Think!

Made a lightning trip to Vienna, eating chocolate cake in a bag
The newspapers said, "she's going to his head,"
They look like two Gurus in drag."

Christ!
You know it ain't easy, you know how hard it can be
The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me

Caught the early plane back to London, fifty acorns tied in a sack
The men from the press said, "we wish you success
It's good to have the both of you back."

Christ!
You know it ain't easy, you know how hard it can be
The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me
The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me