Released: August 25, 1982

Songwriter: Erik Scott Dick Wagner Alice Cooper

Producer: Erik Scott Alice Cooper

If I ain't cool
My daddy gonna send me
To Military School
If I ain't nice
My girlie gonna freeze me
With cold shoulder ice
If I'm real late
My teacher gonna use me
For alligator bait
So, I better be good
I better be good

If I jump on the gas
The cops are gonna jump
All over my back
If I smoke too much
Doctor says he's gonna
Put my lungs in a crutch
If I'm caught without my pants
Consuelo's dad is gonna shoot
Until he sees me dance

So, I better be good
I had better be good
You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
Nice, nice, nice - you better be
Nice, nice, nice - you better be
Nice, nice, nice - Uh, uh, uh, uh
Nice, nice, nice

Nice, nice, nice
Nice, nice, nice
You better be nice tonight

If I spray it on the seat
Lady gonna tie a big knot
In the meat
If I spewey too fast
Lover's gonna stick
My Wrangler in a cast
If zipper grabs skin
I'll know I had it out
When I shoulda kept it in
Ow

I better be good
I better be good
I better be good
Ooh

You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
You better be nice
Nice, nice, nice - you better be
Nice, nice, nice - you better be
Nice, nice, nice - Uh, uh, uh, uh
Nice, nice, nice

I'd better be nice tonight - yeah
Nice, nice, nice
Nice, nice, nice
Nice, nice, nice

Alice Cooper

Alice Cooper is the stage name and ‘fun villain’ character of Vincent Furnier. Cooper became the target of parents and ministers for his dark lyrics and gory theatrical performances that earned him the title Godfather of Shock Rock. Despite once claiming the name was conjured from a ouija board that told him he’s the reincarnation of a 17th century witch, Cooper laughs the topic off with flippant answers like “It was either a Scrabble board or a bowl of alphabet soup” and “I didn’t want a name like Iron Butterfly or Black Sabbath. I wanted it to be something your aunt might be called.”

The band Alice Cooper was originally signed by Frank Zappa to his own record label. Their first notoriety came when Cooper tossed a wayward chicken (possibly arranged by long-time manager Shep Gordon) into the crowd, who then tore it apart at the 1969 Toronto Rock ‘n’ Roll Revival Festival. Newspapers claimed he’d bit the bird’s head off and drank its blood. Zappa advised them to not deny the story and Cooper used it as inspiration to make his character darker.

The band’s teaming with producer Bob Ezrin for their third album Love It To Death led to their US breakthrough with a top 30 hit “I’m Eighteen” in early 1971. By then, the band was already infamous for their stage show, which had escalated into simulated torture and executions. That same year, Killer was released with its two singles “Under My Wheels” and “Be My Lover” finding moderate US success, and both albums being certified gold the following year.