Released: July 26, 2019

Songwriter: NF Tommee Profitt

Producer: Tommee Profitt NF

[Chorus]
I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

[Verse 1]
Yeah, late nights are the worst for me
They bring out the worst in me
Mind runnin', got me feelin' like it hurts to think
If this is all that I wanted, I don't want it, gotta be more for me
All the core beliefs
And every mornin' I wake up and feel like I am not worth it 'cause I'm at war with peace
I go to Hell, walk up to the corpse of me
Look at the body like, "You ain't nothin' but poor and weak"
It's kinda weird
Lately I been feelin' like the only way for me to get away is if I pour the drink
That's more deceit, more defeat
Is this really what I'm born to be?
That's what you get for thinkin' you're unique
So poor, but I'm so wealthy
Need help, but you can't help me
What else can the world sell me?
Tell me lies, I still buy 'em like they're goin' outta stock
But it's not healthy

[Chorus]
I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

[Verse 2]
Yeah, late nights get the best of me
They know how to get to me
Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me
But I don't wanna die, I just wanna get relief
So don't talk to me like you think I'm so successful
What is success when hope has left you?
I am not a spokesman, I'm a broken record
Sick of doin' interviews 'cause I hate myself, agh!
Come across like it's so easy
But I feel like you don't need me
When I feel like you don't need me
Then I feel like you don't see me
And my life has no meaning, drain me
Hands out, tryna ask for love
But when I get it, I just pass it up
Throw it away and think about it later
Diggin' through the trash for drugs
Wish I could give you what you needed, but I can't
I'm scared because

[Chorus]
I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

[Verse 3]
I walk through the ashes of my passions
Reminiscin' with the baggage in my casket
Get lost in the questions I can't answer
Can't stand who I am, but it don't matter
We scream to be free, but I stay captured
Knee-deep in defeat of my own actions
Feel weak, but the peace that I keep lacking
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it
But I can't have it
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it
But I can't have it
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it

[Chorus]
I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it's hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it's hard when I hate myself

[Outro]
When I hate myself
It's kinda hard when I hate myself
I hate myself
It's hard when I hate myself

NF

NF (stylized as ИF), real name Nathan Feuerstein (pronounced “fire-STINE”), is a rapper and songwriter from the small town of Gladwin, Michigan. As a child, Nate’s parents went through a divorce, where he would then live with his mother. Later on, Nate’s life started getting more difficult whenever his mother’s boyfriend started physically abusing him. However, the most traumatic event in Nate’s life was finding his mother dead from a drug overdose.

During the hard times of his life, Nate would fall back on music to escape from the world and express himself freely by writing music and then recording it on his karaoke machine with instrumentals playing in the background. In 2008, Nate participated in the Fine Arts Festival rap competition.

In 2010, he released his first album, Moments, independently. The album got him a record deal with Xist Music in 2012, with a new stage name, NF. Nate released two songs with Xist, and an EP was announced, but never released because he decided to leave the label (however, most of these songs can be found online). NF starting working with fellow Michigan producer, Tommee Profitt, searching for a new label.