Producer: DJ Premier

[Verse 1: Chris Webby]
Axe murder a beat the way I spit a free
Lizzie Borden in the flesh come and get at me
Like the witch of the west, I roll wickedly
Can’t see me like Paranormal Activity
Lickidy split, I rip shit quick-ily
Get ya camcorder out, bitch just picture me
Killin’ shit everyday till you get sick of me
Cause I been a beast, since the priest christened me
Blowin’ up ya tape deck, C.T. to Great Neck
Dutch full of O.G. Kush and some Train Wreck
Safe sex? nah, I’m too raw
I stick it in they jaws and I get ‘em out they drawers
I’m a boss and break laws but never take a loss
Flyer than macaws, I’m just doin’ it because
I’m the best to do this within my age bracket
Waka Flocka, Soulja Boy: none of ‘em can match it
That’s it, jot it down, print it up and fax it
And tell all your boys how Webby spit the madness
Got pussy goin' nuts like I got some catnip
More than a tad sick, I murder ‘em for practice
Do what I do when I…BURN
Then ya gonna Puff Puff Pass, it’s my…..TURN
I throw down with titans, I’m rhymin’ more
More bars than a phone in a Verizon store
Bitch, I’m bigger than a body of a dinosaur
I’m crazy, who would ever blow a line before
Goin’ into a math test, energetic as ever
And all I wrote down was my name, it’s "Chris Webster"
Too drugged up to pay attention in class
So I got kicked out and put my focus on rap
But don’t do like I do, cause I’m fucked in the head
All these un-prescribed meds, now I need special ed
I’m a beast, I’m a dog, I’m a mothafuckin’ pot head
Nerf Gun in my hand, step and you’ll be shot dead
Still mothafuckin’ crazy, don’t doubt me
Pocket full of lint, pack of bogies and my house keys
Aw, jeeze, I be burnin’ the palm trees
Keystone Light to your fuckin’ Dom P
Lazy kid, I still live with my mom, see
Smokin’ bud sleepin’ late, playin’ Nazi Zombies
28 days later, see me in the paper
I’m a mix of Stewie Griffin with a little Darth Vader
Leave a crater in the earth when I drop my mixtape
The north star ain’t this hot for shit’s sake
Chase a 40 o.z. with a box of fish flakes
They might forget my name but they’ll remember how my dick taste
Dictate the scene at all times
Cause the ninja rapper’s back with an Optimus Rhyme
You Underclassmen can’t see The White Noise, bitch
That’s why my mixtape’s bumpin’ in ya boy’s whip
Oh shit, I spit and wreak havoc
My vocal chords like twin Glocks, let me blast it
Cause if anybody steps then I’ma bury ‘em
C.T.’s on my back and I’ma carry ‘em
Smoke blunts till my IQ’s very dumb
Stay high like the water bill at an aquarium

Chris Webby

Chris Webby (Christian Webster) is from the suburbs of Fairfield County, Connecticut. He is best known for his versatile flow, creative punchlines, pop culture references, and love for cartoons (he has a mixtape named after the Ninja Turtles and a tattoo sleeve of Mario characters).

In the last three years, Webster has released five full-length mixtapes, all available at datpiff.com. His first mixtape, The White Noise LP, was released in April of 2009. Teenage Mutant Ninja Rapper, was released only 5 months later on September of 2009, followed by Optimus Rhyme in May 2010, The Underclassmen in July 2010, Best in the Burbs in December 2010, and Webster’s Laboratory in June 2011. He dropped his first EP There Goes The Neighborhood to iTunes in 2011, and most recent mixtape Bars on Me in September 2012.